I'm Suing My Parents
Yes, that's right. I'm suing my parents for defamation of character, for all the years they went around calling me by my full name when I got in trouble. Yes, they called me Matthew Derek Gholson! They used my middle name, and of course, we all know that middle names are now off limits. I mean we definitely cannot say Hillary Rodham Clinton, John Sydney McCain, or even Barack Hussein Obama, for that might insinuate something. I mean, let's forget the facts, and just make everyone "feel" good. Oh well, maybe I'll settle out of court for a blackberry cobbler.
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In other words, ubiquitous carapace
17 hours ago
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